Question Number: 24090

Law 18 - Common Sense 10/5/2010

RE: Other

ted of niles, il. usa asks...

as a father I'm speaking for other parents when we watch our 12 year olds play from the side line we tend to call out strategies the ref. came over and warned us not to coach the kids which was rude and unprofessional.what can be done about a ref like that was that proper to tell us not to tell the pass

Answer provided by Referee Michelle Maloney

At this age, it is good for the players to be listening to their coach and no one else. They will get conflicting information from the parents, and it confuses them. If coach said 'Do X.' but Dad or Mom said 'Do Y.' the poor kid has been put in an awful position. Please don't do that to your kids!

All the youth leagues I've ever been associated with as a parent, coach, administrator or referee have recommended parents and fans keep comments focused on how well the kids are doing, or complimenting how hard they are trying. Giving directions on how to play is counterproductive, because at this age they are still learning and figuring out the game. Let them. Lessons learned by doing things the wrong way stick better than following directions blindly.

As for the referee, perhaps this was over-officious, but I'm sure it was well intentioned. It does not sound like it was rude or unprofessional. Take it in the spirit it was offered - to help the children - and let it go. We'll all be happier.

Answer provided by Referee Gary Voshol

The coach probably wanted to thank the ref, because then the coach didn't have to tell you to be quiet.

At every level of play, directions from the sideline by parents or coaches are ineffective. At the younger ages, it just confuses the players and by the time they figure out what you wanted them to do, it's too late. At the older ages play changes so quickly that the situation is different by the time you finish your directive.

Players will learn for themselves what works and what doesn't. The coach will give the team direction at appropriate times, like practice and halftime. Then when the team is older, they will have both the tactics and the strategy needed to succeed.

Answer provided by Referee Dennis Wickham

Most referees ignore spectators unless their conduct affects the players on the field. But, many leagues ask referees to enforce the laws that limits instructions to the coach inside the technical area or only within ten yards of the halfway line. It is very possible that the referee was enforcing a league rule. I've usually found, however, that asking politely is more effective than shouting commands.

Answer provided by Referee Joe McHugh

Hi Ted
As a referee there are many times when I felt that the involvement of parents in coaching was unhelful to the players. Adults bring adult values to the game which is unhelpful and I would much rather that the young player express themselves in the play and enjoy it.
However it is not the referees role to get involved in preventing parents coaching from the line. Indeed I would recommend to a referee that if he wishes to deal with spectators that he/she does that through the coach/club officials rather than directly.

Answer provided by Referee Keith Contarino

Ted as a former U12 coach,parent and referee I can flat out tell you whether the referee was right or wrong, you absolutely should NOT be giving strategy to the players. First, if the referee thinks you are officially part of the coaching staff, it is against the Laws for you to coach anywhere outside your technical area which is over at the bench. Second, no offense but been there done that, and U12 parents typically don't know much about playing, coaching, or refereeing soccer third, the coach can't stand it when you do this. He or she may say nothing but, trust me, it drives coaches nuts as they are having enough trouble trying to get your kids to do what they want them to, fourth, this referee may have felt you were interfering with the players