Question Number: 17510

Character, Attitude and Control 10/25/2007

RE: Rec Under 12

Sarah Manning of Valley Springs, CA USA asks...

This question is a follow up to question 17477

I agree not funny at all!! Very upsetting actually. There are soo many problems with this league you are left feeling hopeless! I teach my children to play hard, be a team player and never give up. I don't however agree with teaching my child to back off when he is winning or kick with the opposite foot to make it easier on the other team! My question since he excels in school should he write with his other hand so everything is fair? It's crazy & we thought it would get better when we recived a new president on the board...when in fact it got worse. I will write letters But my son has had it, he wants to play to the best of his ability, But here you are punished for doing well.

Answer provided by Referee Chuck Fleischer

All that can be said is welcome to political correctness. You'll find none of that here. Of course that doesn't help your son! Remember foard members are elected by all members and players are members... Hmmmm..

Regards,

Answer provided by Referee Richard Dawson

Try refereeing a match between Israelis and the Palestinians or the Serbs and Croatians it is as good or as bad as those participating choose to make it. Your perception of the league you have the misfortune of playing in is certainly poor. Is it ALL the fault of one or two or all who participate? If there are problems in the political area look to the massive drain on our faith in those entrusted to have our best interest at heart within the political government systems. Miniature versions exist in principle and reality at all levels of life. Yes it irritates, frustrates and you wonder if there are truly good people left.

Coaching hat on .
What rubbish is this fair bit about teaching with the other foot? If as a coach my players dominate the opposing team what better opportunity to practice IMPROVING the skills we do not have. The opposing team if humiliated because your son could slot goals all day with his right foot teaches him what? Do not confuse fair play and fairness with reality of opportunity and learning a bit about life. Adversity is a fact of life it is not a consequence but rather an opportunity to become more than you already are. Playing hard to exploit a team hardly qualifies as a winning attitude. Setting the table with expectations is another matter. Use his weak foot to setup an opportunity for a team mate who has yet to score qualifies as a remarkable bit of rising to that next level. You only achieve something if you have yet to achieve it..

You need to explain just what you mean by fair and hopeless. If you have ever been to the Holy land you will have seen things that make the words fair and hopeless mean the same thing. As my good friend and colleague Ref Fleischer states there is no political correctness here, we say exactly what we think and why we choose to think that way
Cheers.

Answer provided by Referee Keith Contarino

Maybe your child should wear ankle weights or a 30 pound backpack. Try finding another league and good luck with your search

Answer provided by Referee Michelle Maloney

Is this the only league your son can play in? Having been a victim of "player wars" in my time, I can certainly sympathize with you. It never ceased to amaze me how grown ups could screw up a good sport for kids by mucking about in matters they did not understand. There should be a place to play for those who really just wish to kick a ball around and have some fun, no pressure, no great demands, but there should also be a place to play for those who are true aficionados of the sport and who give blood, sweat and tears to play at a high(er) level. They can and should co-exist, and neither is more or less important than the other, in the greater scheme of things. I got run out of office for defending the rights of players to play at the level to which they could rise, instead of pushing a plan to water everything down to the lowest common denominator. Ah, well. Interestingly enough, a year later, the parents who wanted my head suddenly decided that having their kids be able to play select soccer was more fun than rec (for the kids who were really good and wanted to) but I got no credit. Dang it. Keep fighting the good fight, Sarah. The kids are worth it. I do think there is merit, however, in asking players to play their weaker sides when against a non-challenging opponent, because they can then strengthen their whole game without cost to the team. It's like we teach young referees to work on something they are not good at yet when they have a slow game. That's the time to practice new angles of view, to try out getting into the PA at the end of each run to one end or other of the field, or as an AR to work on sharp, sharp signals everytime, eye contact, proper mechanics, absolute 100% correct stance on offside. There is value to that - a great deal.

Answer provided by Referee Gary Voshol

Sarah, it sounds like your son is in a league where teams are encouraged to not run up the score against opponents. There is the proper place for this kind of rule, especially in a youth recreational program. It would be inappropriate at higher levels - although any team could be sporting and not attempt to kick the snot out of their opponents.

A few years back I posted on a chat-type forum about a team at a fairly high level who won their last two games by a combined score of 55-0. Howls of protest about how this team should be barred from the game, the coach taken out and tarred and feathered, etc. It was Australia in the WC qualifiers, still then in Oceania. New Zealand had previously tied a game, and since the factor in deciding who moved on in qualification was goal differential, AUS was attempting to build a huge margin just in case they happened to have a tie game later on in the qualifiers.

There is also a proper way to go about holding down the score when you are incredibly superior to your opponent. Some teams run the score to the max allowed, and then yell, "No more goals." They then play keep-away for the next 40 minutes. BOOOOR-ING! The intent is to not have a team feel bad about getting scored upon. They don't feel any better when the opponents' actions say, "You're so bad, we could score at will but we will make a farce of the game instead."

The proper way to go about it is for a coach to realize early on that there could be a blowout, and take steps then and there. 3-0 in 12 minutes, and the ball has only been in your defending half twice? Start your changes now. Move players to unfamiliar positions. Have them play with the non-dominant foot. Pass the ball around X number of times before taking a shot, X a large number. Feed the ball only to the player who hasn't scored yet, so as to share the wealth. Maybe take out a player, so you can practice playing down in the event of absent or sent off players. All of these things can help your team to continue to have a meaningful learning experience, still playing a soccer game, while not humiliating your opponent.

Of course all of this falls outside the referee's sphere of influence.

The following questions were asked as a follow up to the above question...

See Question: 17593